#291 ⇧ (+44/-39) ⇩
etarip: i sort of prefer opera now
etarip: but i always have a place in my heart for FF
Uhmerwell: yay opera
airtank: Etarip: Very nice logo indeed. I kind of came a little when I saw it.
#8714 ⇧ (+79/-31) ⇩
<Cheez> a client asked me to change their project server environment so it was like "the rest of the internet"
<Cheez> so i filled it with porn
#834 ⇧ (+38/-25) ⇩
<@Glench> that's horrible
<Bucket> OH YEAH WELL YOUR MOM'S HORRIBLE
<month> EXCEPT IN BED
#9826 ⇧ (+48/-30) ⇩
<Althir> Shitshitshti
<Althir> *Shitshitshit
<ladymondegreen> did you just correct a swearing typo althir?
<Althir> I did indeed.
* ladymondegreen puts althir's pendant on a crown and declares him king of the pedants
<Althir> A pedant pendant! I love it!
* Althir hugs ladymondegreen
#1222 ⇧ (+26/-22) ⇩
<lupine_uni> attitude is incredibly more important than arrangement of physical features or BMI, anyway :)
<lupine_uni> as long as you're intelligent and caring, looks are unimportant
<Awesome_Sauce> Although daaaaayam, woman, you is fine....
#545 ⇧ (+49/-34) ⇩
<April> myyy love
<Bucket> there's only you in my life, the only thing that's right.
<April> my first love, you're every breathe that I take, you're every step I make.
<April> and your eyes
<Bucket> your eyes, your eyes
<April> they tell me how much you care
<Bucket> oooh ye-ee-yes
<April> you will always be
<Bucket> my... endless loooove!
<%Coldcell> bucket, and your eyes =~ s/eyes/thighs/
<Bucket> OK, Coldcell
<%Coldcell> bucket, and your eyes =~ s/eyes/thighs/
<Bucket> OK, Coldcell
#8771 ⇧ (+21052/-20355) ⇩
<Bucket> Bananas!
[ This quote is a placeholder; it collects any votes cast while in Banana Mode. --Ed. ]
#7121 ⇧ (+47/-31) ⇩
<OcularElm> snark, OMG OMG OMG
<OcularElm> WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN
<Bucket> Impaled on a flagpole above a dead, urine-soaked homeless person in the back alley of an urban sprawl of death and decay.
<snark> what bucket said
<Bucket> What I said is very relevant
<snark> it was not the best
<Feriority> that's a pretty good reason to be missing
#4580 ⇧ (+48/-37) ⇩
<Royall> ferret: study or do things besides study
<flyingferret> study
<Royall> OOOoOH NOOOOO
<Royall> ferret: study history or study Royall's made up subject that only consists of one fact
<flyingferret> study history
<Royall> flyingferret: study history for a decent amount of time or study history for 5 seconds
<flyingferret> study history for a decent amount of time
<Royall> mother FUCKER
#2220 ⇧ (+1063/-440) ⇩
loquacius: We were discussing the vagina as storage device!
khmer: I heard relsqui uses her vagina as a block storage device
SeveredCross: /dev/vagina?
khmer: i was thinking for legos
loquacius: Also, stepping on Legos is painful enough, and vaginas are somewhat more sensitive than feet
khmer: i knew this girl once who could put two lego blocks in her vagina and then when she took them out they were joined
khmer: note: above story is completely fake
loquacius: I mistyped that as "stepping on vaginas is painful enough" the first time through
khmer: i knew this girl who could put 15 windows 95 floppy disks and a compaq presario in her vagina, and when she took them out, it was installed and configured
khmer: note: above story is entirely true
loquacius: I knew this girl who could put a Robo Sapiens in her vagina, and when she took it out, it was a real boy
khmer: i knew this girl who could put 5 east asian diplomats in her vagina, and when she took them out, the PRC recognized taiwan as an independent nation, and north korea was opened to foreign trade
loquacius: That one's actually plausible
khmer: hm true
khmer: i knew this girl once who could put an NES controller into her vagina, and when she took it out, she'd done a 11-minute mario 1 speed run
khmer: i knew this girl once would could put a penis into her vagina, and when she took it out, she thought i loved her
#9327 ⇧ (+63/-30) ⇩
<Nautilus> Ariamis: they cause rubber wars, though
<Ariamis> Nautilus: war is the cornerstone of industry, I see no problem with this
<Ariamis> Nautilus: Er, to clarify, I'm kidding.
<Nautilus> Ariamis: me too.
<Nautilus> well, mostly.
<taixzo> I'm usualy fairly scientifically literate, but can anyone explain to me in plain English what this sentence means: "This is an instability in which the magnetic pressure front can out-run or "blow-by" the plasma armature due to the radial dependence of acceleration current density, drastically reducing device efficiency" ?
<Nautilus> the Belgian congo was basically a warzone created by an immediate economic need for bicycle rubber
<taixzo> ok
#8713 ⇧ (+49/-29) ⇩
<snark> do you guys remember condition zero
<syntax> snark: the country strike hasn't no one remembers?
<syntax> s/country/counter/
<snark> syntax: are you okay
<syntax> GIVING SWORE
<syntax> FUCKING SWYPE
#5183 ⇧ (+126/-49) ⇩
* Ktai jumps into bucket
* Bucket launches Ktai into the air.
< Ktai> weeeeeee
-!- Ktai [fircuser@hide-1CEE5A7.tmodns.net] has left #xkcd []
#10013 ⇧ (+42/-33) ⇩
* WassPord headdesks
* Bucket wallnoses
* WassPord buttchairs
* jglauche facepalms
* Bucket chairsits
* thomas0comer couchsprawls
* XMPPwocky tonguetables
* SpicyLemon elbowforeheads
#22 ⇧ (+668/-655) ⇩
<Cctoide> http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Squircle
<relsqui> please tell me that has to do with a circle of squirrels
* relsqui checks
<relsqui> aw man :(
#10131 ⇧ (+86/-65) ⇩
< Walrushead> how did Mr. Ed move his mouth in the TV show?
< Walrushead> obviously there was a voice actor
< XanT> They filmed a real talking horse then dubbed over it.
#7339 ⇧ (+36/-22) ⇩
phobiac: i saw a "hooters to go" today
phobiac: i think that defeats the purpose of hooters
Beelzebub: phobiac: yes it does
Beelzebub: unless you get to take a waitress home with you :D
Beelzebub: "thank's for my food...and i'll take......cristy home this time..."
Beelzebub: [there's always a cristy when hot waitresses are concerned]
#9222 ⇧ (+62/-31) ⇩
* Cheez ponders any possible etymological relationship between sphincter and sphinx
<IceKarma>Cheez, http://www.etymonline.com/index.php?term=sphinx
<IceKarma>Cheez, "yes, yes there is"
<Cheez>haha, that's awesome :D
<Palomides>"sphinges" :|
<Cheez>"The Strangler"
#9386 ⇧ (+34/-28) ⇩
* Bucket fires a katana at the ceiling
< katana> OW
#8709 ⇧ (+65/-26) ⇩
<@snark> I don't do drugs. I *am* drugs.
<@aliaras> Snark, I like you.
<@snark> you should probably like salvador dali instead, since I stole it from him
<@snark> but to use an expression of my very own: good artists copy, great artists steal.
#6661 ⇧ (+41/-24) ⇩
< Feriority> of course, CS ALWAYS follows their metaphors through, given that trees are objects with a root up in the air and various branches and leaves extending out beneath it
< coaxmetal> exactly
< coaxmetal> and a heap is in fact a form of tree
#6337 ⇧ (+64/-35) ⇩
<Dekoa> I'm happy
<RK> :D
<Bucket> The cure for happiness is realizing that Rosie O'Donnell masturbates.
<Dekoa> THANK YOU, BUCKET!!!
<Bucket> No problem.
<Spork> Why, Bucket? Why?
<Bucket> Because I'm the asshole!
#5060 ⇧ (+64/-33) ⇩
<hooloo> Bucket: IRC medical advice
<swampy> Man, this Vista machine I'm working on has so many problems!
<Bucket> Stop touching it. Oh, and wash your hands.
#8326 ⇧ (+85/-27) ⇩
<maxh> No matter how much I learn about computers, I will always find it amazing that someone across town can press a some puttons and cause a message to be sent from their office, to Europe, to California, and then back to me in a few minutes.
<OptimisticCynic> maxh: You know what's even crazier? Cell phones
<OptimisticCynic> maxh: In a second or two, your voice goes to SPACE
<maxh> OptimisticCynic: Because of INVISIBLE LIGHT.
<maxh> High-frequency radio is even weirder. You bounce your invisible light OFF OF THE FUCKING SKY.
#9417 ⇧ (+39/-28) ⇩
-->| linglinglingling (~linglingl@hide-B18E41CA.mobile.uci.edu) has joined #xkcd
<relsqui> linglinglingling: bananaphone!
<schwal> linglinglingling: I think you're going to have to get used to relsqui doing that every time you join.
<relsqui> schwal: http://xkcd.com/242/
|<-- linglinglingling has left naos.foonetic.net (Quit: Colloquy for iPhone - http://colloquy.mobi)
#6677 ⇧ (+41/-26) ⇩
Dark-Fx: lingrush sounds like a rushling
lingrush: What's a rushling
DesertEagle: mini rush limbaugh?
lingrush: I'm gonna take over the NFL, zerg style
#10395 ⇧ (+86/-56) ⇩
<eezo> Palomides: nurses always have a field day with me when they draw my blood.
<eezo> Mostly because I never even flinch.
<eezo> And one time, I took the needle from one clumsy nurse's hand and stuck it in my vein myself. Because she missed seven times in a row.
<Palomides> haha
<Palomides> that's horrible
<eezo> I'm pretty sure that nurse was close to fainting when she saw that.
#941 ⇧ (+49/-36) ⇩
=-= Mode #xkcd-signal +v dlb by moderator
<dlb> i should get my voice back anytime now
<dlb> haha, i knew it!
<moderator> dlb, you have been muted for 17 minutes 4 seconds.
#994 ⇧ (+321/-153) ⇩
<+NeverDescriptive> Yes, they gather in groups. Like a murder of crows, i'm pretty sure you have a damnation of uber-christians
<+FunnyMan3595> NeverDescriptive: Yes, and that damn nation is called the USA.
<+NatchDan> Somewhere in the world a drummer just did a rimshot - and he has /no idea why/.
#7891 ⇧ (+60/-21) ⇩
<TheMiNd> I want to make violent, angry sex to you
<freelancer> I want to grammar your sentence
#8166 ⇧ (+78/-29) ⇩
<Ranzear> I'm setting up a
<Bucket> factoid just so I can make
<Ranzear> a witty haiku
<Bucket> Was that a haiku?
<Ranzear> Yes that was a haiku.
#4100 ⇧ (+62/-32) ⇩
< Megatriorchis> Bucket: make me a sandwich
* Bucket makes Megatriorchis a sandwich.
< Megatriorchis> thank you, Bucket
* Bucket eats dirt to see what it tastes like
#4404 ⇧ (+37/-21) ⇩
<Xenos> Guns would be a good place for DRM
<Xenos> Or FRM, Firing Restrictions Management
<thatGuy> Xenos: there kind of is... it's called "the wrong ammo will cause the gun to explode and remove your face"
#2365 ⇧ (+52/-51) ⇩
• Nobody loves You
Nobody: ♥_♥
You: I love you too, nobody.
Nobody: xoxoxoxox
You: haha
Nobody is now known as Frowardd.
You: holy shit, that was Frowardd who loved me?
You: PEDOPHILE
#9207 ⇧ (+65/-23) ⇩
<@Stereo> ok so i come from a culture (canada) where it's normal to say 'sorry' if you bump into someone... what is the alternative that makes this a thing that identifies someone as canadian
< ellipsis> Stereo: Out of my way, asshole
<@snark> ellipsis, for example, is from new york
#783 ⇧ (+42/-31) ⇩
<@zigdon> why would you have advil?
<SeveredCross> zigdon: To sooth the post-abortion inflammation.
<KBC> You dig around in there with a coathanger, I bet you need pain killers.
<April> KBC: WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU.
<April> Don't you know that Vicodin works WAY better?
#6489 ⇧ (+37/-22) ⇩
<benley> spenguin: it was more than 3 people, so it was some sort of love polyfuckahedron
#7742 ⇧ (+236/-106) ⇩
<tankgunk> Fluorine
<Bucket> Fluorine - Symbol: F - Atomic Number: 9 - Atomic Weight: 18.99844
<tankgunk> Uranium
<Bucket> Uranium - Symbol: U - Atomic Number: 92 - Atomic Weight: 238.02891
<tankgunk> Carbon
<Bucket> Carbon - Symbol: C - Atomic Number: 6 - Atomic Weight: 12.0107
<tankgunk> Potassium
<Bucket> <Potassium> I shouldn't have disturbed my pussy
#8222 ⇧ (+435/-208) ⇩
* Caffeine puts a cat in Bucket
* Bucket eats the cat
< Caffeine> OI!
< Caffeine> DON'T DO THAT
< Caffeine> BAD BUCKET
< Bucket> I'm not bad! I'm just a product of my environment!
< Caffeine> You... It... I...
< Caffeine> Touche.
#8933 ⇧ (+42/-24) ⇩
< XMPPwocky> .... I've been modelling a bus arbiter using my cat
< XMPPwocky> front paws are REQ lines, back paws are ACK lines
< XMPPwocky> my cat doesn't seem to like it
< XMPPwocky> and, of course, tail as BUSY
< XMPPwocky> the nice thing about cats is that they effectively come in a very large DIP package
< XMPPwocky> and they have built in wire strippers
< XMPPwocky> not to be confused with actual strippers, as these are teeth
< XMPPwocky> the interface, however, is decidedly unintuitive
< XMPPwocky> and there is somewhat of a noise issue
< XMPPwocky> however, the latter can be beneficial- a properly working device will emit a low purr, while a failed device will make a screeching noise
< XMPPwocky> the part is also very well insulated
< XMPPwocky> and has a built in thermal generator for operation under a wide range of temperatures
< XMPPwocky> however, it is very difficult to solder
< XMPPwocky> The component contains automatic overcurrent protection; in the event of excess current being drawn, the part will remove itself from the circuit and hide under your couch
< XMPPwocky> the overheating protection operates in a similar manner.
< XMPPwocky> this will also trigger the screeching noise.
< XMPPwocky> The part must be kept well-ventilated, and well-fed.
#2350 ⇧ (+35/-29) ⇩
Maximinus: quake is now officially listed at 5.9: http://www.geonet.org.nz/earthquake/quake/latest.html
salami: Maximinus: quake is much better than 5.9. i'd give it at least 8.5
#674 ⇧ (+60/-38) ⇩
< fletch> ok who wants to bet on how long it will take for there to be a thread in the 'Individual Threads' forum section, by a guy with nothing real to say, that just wants to start a popular post
-!- Loaxes [Kazanoe@hide-FECDE8FF.lb.shawcable.net] has joined #xkcd
< Loaxes> WOO
< Loaxes> I finally got first post!
#6155 ⇧ (+60/-34) ⇩
< wraith> every channel has its share of smartasses but here at #xkcd we say fuck that, and throw in the rest of the channel for free
#6139 ⇧ (+214/-97) ⇩
<&Randall> I was getting a smoothie at the borders cafe in Burlington Vt, and to look up my membership card they asked for my email. I said "randall@xkcd.com" and they looked me up. when giving me my drink, the other barista said "xkcd, like the webcomic?" "yeah" "cool!" "thanks" "i didn't know they offered email."
#4187 ⇧ (+37/-31) ⇩
<Robotheart2> knoppix booted fine. just trying to figure out the interwebtubenetification of it all
<Aegis> Blechhh.
<Aegis> It's called the motherfuckin' INTER-NET
#10687 ⇧ (+221/-175) ⇩
<Agafnd> ...what's the opposite of emo vampire
<bhuddah> lemmy, i would say.
<Agafnd> cheerful pixie
<Agafnd> wait, opposite vampire would spit blood on people at midnight
<Agafnd> ...there's a kind of blood spitting lizard i think?
<bhuddah> oh please.
<Agafnd> apparently this process is known as "autohaemorrhaging"
<Agafnd> so i guess the opposite of a vampire is an autohaemorr-hag! :D
<bhuddah> it's not like you can just balance it out with that kind of action
<Agafnd> i guess not. vampires also sleep in cough-ins
<Agafnd> an autohaemorr-hag, correspondingly, would only cough while awake and out of doors
#6787 ⇧ (+62/-31) ⇩
< Spi_Waterwing> hey guys, what's a country where there is very little government?
< Puddle> Somalia.
< Bucket> Somalia is the land of libertarians/anarchists
< Spi_Waterwing> Puddle: Bucket agrees.
< Bucket> I'm easily intimidated by peer pressure.
#1686 ⇧ (+27/-26) ⇩
<habbyboy12y> YO
<habbyboy12y> MAKE ME OP
<habbyboy12y> OR I REPORT THIS TO MIBBIT
<habbyboy12y> YOU HAVE 10 SECONDES
<habbyboy12y> 10
<habbyboy12y> 9
<habbyboy12y> 8
<habbyboy12y> 7
<habbyboy12y> 6
<Great_Briton> you won't last 10
<habbyboy12y> 5
<habbyboy12y> 4
<Great_Briton> before a kick
<habbyboy12y> 3
<habbyboy12y> 2
<habbyboy12y> 1
<habbyboy12y> 0
<Great_Briton> lol
<habbyboy12y> just did
* Bucket does it again
ChanServ sets mode: +o shoofle
* shoofle sets mode: +b *!*60ef2d0b@*.mibbit.com
* habbyboy12y was kicked by shoofle (shoofle)
#8117 ⇧ (+51/-18) ⇩
<cuddlefish> Dear amazon: I'm not gay. Stop suggesting sex toys to me.
<Nougatti> sex toys: it's a gay thing
<towo> cuddlefish: Check why they're suggested.
<baslisks> hey, homosexuals aren't the only ones who use sex toys
<cuddlefish> towo: Because I bou.... wait what
<cuddlefish> towo: "Fantasy Egg for Him", suggested because I bought... welding goggles.
<cuddlefish> what the FUCK
<cuddlefish> how are those things POSSIBLY related..
<cuddlefish> who welds during sex
<Burstaholic> I'll join your I-beams, baby
#5989 ⇧ (+70/-37) ⇩
<mint> Alan Turing committed suicide by dipping an apple into cynaide and taking a bite.
<mint> Remind anyone of a popular computer brands logo?